Obitine-A rememberance
by ObitineWinterWidowShipper
Summary: Obi-Wan pours his feeling out to Anakin after Satine's death. AU after The Lawless. A way for me to deal with my Obitine feelings.


Obi-Wan was meditating. Not that it helped. He felt nothing could ease the loss of his love.

He had wished countless times that it been himself killed instead of Satine. As much as it pained him to think, there had been no way to save her; just as much as he wished there had.

His grief was a problem. It had overwhelmed him for days. When he tried to sleep his dreams were filled with Satine's death. He could still feel the touch of her hand upon his cheek, her melodious voice as she spoke her last words. She had said, "Remember, my dear Obi-Wan. I've loved you always, I always will." They had fought before, but the wrongs committed had always been righted. Now, there was the slightest urge to hunt Mual down across the galaxy and extract his revenge. But, as much as he wished he could do that, there was no way it was possible.

The council wouldn't give permission. The thought amused and angered Obi-Wan simultaneously. He didn't need the Council's permission to avenge Satine's death. But, he was a Jedi, and the Jedi answered to the Council. And therefore he could not go to the council without their relationship being found out.

Not that it mattered, now that Satine was dead. His throat tightened as he thought of her.

His next problem was Anakin. He had noticed that there was something troubling Obi-Wan. His next step had been to pursue him everywhere, being ever so stubborn about it. Because of this, many days Obi-Wan simply resided to his quarters and meditated, as he was now.

His meditation was a way for him to think things over, a slight way to mull his grief. His life felt like he had no purpose. Part of Obi-Wan knew that he should commit himself to another mission, possibly with Anakin and Ahsoka. As much as he wished that were possible, it were not. He was too withdrawn to commit himself to something without questions being asked. Of course, there were already questions being asked. Yet, most of these questions were asked by himself. Why couldn't he save her? Why did she have to die? Could he have done anything?

Obi-Wan was a man of truth. He forced himself to accept the hard truth that Satine was dead; she was not coming back, and there was nothing he could have done. This truth caused Obi-Wan many days of grief, mostly spent in his quarters, sometimes weeping over his loss and other spent thinking about memories.

The door slid open behind Obi-Wan, and a voice said, "I thought I'd find you here."

"I assure you I'm fine." Obi-Wan replied, perhaps a bit hastily, "Ex-"

"Oh, no you don't have an excuse this time," Anakin said. "Just explain."

Obi-Wan let out a sigh. In all honestly, he was trapped. Perhaps he could explain to Anakin. He could understand. When he considered the fact, perhaps Anakin would understand. "I will reveal to you what's been troubling me, if I must. On one condition." At this Anakin walked around from behind Obi-Wan and sat in front of him, "Not a word of this goes to anyone else. Especially not the council."

"Consider it done." Anakin replied, perhaps a bit too smugly.

There was no going back now for Obi-Wan. "Duchess Satine is dead," he said, his voice cracking with grief, "you know at least this much."

"But her death affected you more than it should have." Anakin guessed.

Obi-Wan now realized that he should have confided to Anakin sooner. Of course he would understand, with his mother's death. "We-Satine and I-were captured and brought before Maul. I simply assumed he would kill me. Instead he turned my strengths against me and…" Obi-Wan paused, his blue-gray eyes clouded with pain. "He killed her." His gaze drifted downward, unwilling to say any more. "There was nothing I could do about it." A single tear slipped downward on his cheek, describing his pain to Anakin.

"I understand." Anakin replied. As Obi-Wan looked up at him he continued, "It was like that when my mother died." He couldn't think of anything else to say, he sat there in silence, his mere presence a small comfort to Obi-Wan.


End file.
